Brothers has your woman ever tested the level of love you have for her? Did you pass the test? How did she test you and ladies why do you test the man you truly love?
This post comes from a man who believes he's in a great relationship -- except, of course, for the fact that his girlfriend constantly feels the need to stir things up and start unnecessary arguments.
Men and women are different. A man, by nature, tends to look for comfort and consistency in his relationship.
A woman, on the other hand, tends to turn her primary relationship into a "Perpetual-Improvement Project." So, if there's nothing to work on or process, she's compelled to create something in order to continue work on her Project. As my Big Sister Seun would say, "They've always gotta mess with things when things don't need fixin'."
You've probably heard the old familiar saying: A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
The interesting thing about familiar sayings is that a lot of them are based on real wisdom. In relationships, a man avoids change while a woman thrives on it -- if things seem a bit placid and static, it's time for her to stir things up!
In my own words… they have to do it
In essence, yes Segun, I think that women do have an innate need to test and push their men. Why, exactly, must they do it? Ask 50 psychologists and you'll get 50 different answers. But I say that one of the main reasons they push is to see if there's anything there to push up against.
They need to know that you have a backbone, that you'll set limits, that you'll stand up for yourself. It makes them feel safe when you won't take any crap. It somehow provides them with reassurance that you are strong enough and confident enough to fight back when you're provoked and that you're capable of protecting them from danger.
Trying to check a man's protective capabilities by starting arguments is not totally logical, but it is bio -logical. It's a drive that goes back to the days when the womenfolk huddled in the cave while the men fought off a pack of ravenous saber-toothed tigers.
A woman's actual physical survival was dependent on having a strong, brave male at her side who could hunt and kill dangerous animals, and protect her from hostile tribes. That survival-based drive for a provider/protector still motivates the modern female.
it'll always be this way
So, even if a woman has super high Interest Level in you and she is also a sweet, loving and giving person, it's not uncommon for her to continually 'test your mettle' somehow. She'll always feel the need to dig and question, pry and push in subtle or overt ways. Why? Because she's a female.
Remember guys; the man who passes the test is the man who won't be tested.
How Women Test Men
For guys, knowing how women test men will be sort of an ‘expelliarmus’, to disarm women and their tactics! If you do not want to lose out on these brothers, then you might want to stay with me on the love line on what is coming next!
Guys, let me tell you something before I get to the heart of the show tonight. If you thought that you are oozing with social and emotional intelligence just because you dated exactly those girls you wanted, sorry, you have a misconception. Even if those girls seemed to be dumb according to you, ladies will be ladies! However intelligent you are brothers, women will always have an upper hand when it comes to social intelligence and delicate matters of the heart. This social intelligence and overall ‘thinking with the heart’ quality is totally used by women while dating! Men don’t even remotely realize that sometimes when the woman they love is doing something which is not ‘her’, she is just testing him! So men, you have to catch a glimpse of how women test men! That’s what the love line is all about tonight. The big question Why do Women Constantly Tests The Men They Love? and ladies, how do you test your mans love for you?
Why Women Test Men?
Guys, brace yourselves as these are things which beyond such talks or articles, no lady is going to mention about. Yes, the reasons as to why do women test men are going to be discussed tonight on the love line. The first and foremost reason for women throwing those obscure and unexpected googlies to guys is that they want to see what you really are. Further women also want to get an idea about how emotionally strong the guy is or are you a pushover. What women look for in men? A woman needs reassurance all the time that the man she loves is there for her and is strong enough. Another thing a woman wants to know is if her ‘man’ is ‘man’ enough to commit. Eventually these testing times are created by a woman to see if the guy can be trusted.
I bet you never knew right? Now I have given you a peek into how a woman’s mind works? Now it’s time to know and picture how women test men and throw these surprises and how you can deal with them. Mind you, this is a part of a guide to understanding women in relationships!
How Women Test Men and Passing the Test
Okay, it is the time to fight brothers, if you truly love her, then you have to pass the test! You just have no option. Women test guys on several aspects in a relationship. Yes, that is how complicated they are! Women, to say the least basically involves testing for loyalty, attention and trust. Here we go then! The time is ticking!
Let me let you into some things I discovered on my own.
Test #1
The first comes the loyalty test regarding how women test men. Many a times women feel insecure in the relationship. In case your woman calls you up constantly and irks you with ‘where are you’ ‘what are you up to’, just do not get worked up. Never ever lie to such questions. Give precise answers, but never lie. If you lose your head and start a fight, well, then you have had it. Even if you would not be doing anything unacceptable, your woman is going to be suspicious. Take this as a serious relationship advice guys!
Test #2
A woman in a relationship needs to know that whatever she says is being given an ear. In short, she needs full attention of her partner and she can test it for sure! If you are reading or doing anything else and your woman starts talking to you, make sure that you pay complete attention to what she is saying. Better still, keep aside whatever you are doing, give your inputs to the conversation and then go back to what you were doing. If you do not listen to a woman when she is talking, you would be committing the worst crime ever against her! This is the classic case of how women test men and how to pass them. Speaking and sharing is important as that can sort out the relationship issues, if any, hence, pay attention guys!
Test #3
Another test in how women test men is to follow the gaze of the guy. If you are out somewhere - eating or drinking and if a beautiful, sexy woman goes by, your girl will immediately look at you to see how you look at the woman who passed by. To pass this test, casually glancing at her and then looking back at your girl is the best bet. That will mean you are getting to the tricks of understanding women! Gaze at the girl till she disappears and you are calling for trouble!
This is just a trailer of how a woman have these discreet and instant methods of being sure if he is the guy. There are many more such things guys, which fall in this category! But I am sure now you know how women test men!
Generalizing what a woman wants from a man is not easy. Most women think differently and it takes a lot of intuition on your part to really understand what a woman’s thinking. Some women will say they want men who can protect them (like Prince Charming, or some knight from a fairytale). Some will say they want men who will treat them as an equal.
Asking a girl directly will only confuse you, so don’t. However, there is a way to find out what a woman wants from you by taking a closer look at how she tests you.
What are these relationship tests?
Relationship tests come in various forms. They can be the loaded questions that a woman asks on your first date, or they can be the small “pretty-please” favors that a girl asks of you.
Whatever they are, they tell of what the girl you’re with really wants in a boyfriend.
For example…
1. She wants to know if you are a pushover.
Most women are looking for boyfriends, but they can’t pass up the men who are so willing to be their slaves. Can you imagine having a personal “bottomless” purse following you around in a shopping mall or buying you drinks in a bar? That’s the kind of slavery I’m talking about.
The women see these men as “guy friends” who can be used. Not that women WANT to use them, but these guys make girls feel that it’s their pleasure to be of service… so hey, who can resist?
Women will think of being with these men to a certain extent. As far as being practical goes, oh yeah definitely, these pushovers are a catch. But girls get bored of these men pretty quickly, particularly when these guys start demanding something back.
Remember, you want a woman to pursue you, fall in love with you and treat you like her king… you don’t want her to pity you or take you for granted because you let her walk all over you.
2. She wants to know if you can commit.
Monogamy becomes an issue when a girl suspects you’re a player. This line of thinking shows in the way she asks are-you-a-player questions.
For instance, a woman asks, “How come you don’t have a girlfriend? Can’t you commit?”
You can say “I’ll commit when I find the right girl.”
Saying it this way is like killing two birds with one stone. First, you’re telling her you’re capable of commitment. Second, you’re making her wonder if she’s the “right girl” you’re talking about.
3. She wants to know if you can be trusted.
More specifically, she wants to know if you’re going to hit on her best friend when she’s not looking.
To test you, a girl will concoct some weird “what if” scenarios like … a threesome between you, her and another girl. Whatever you do, just say no.
Even if you secretly want to do her friend, just say you “will never do it”.
Trust is an issue in most relationships, and a girl will only really let herself fall for you if you show that you can be trusted.
So, the next time, your girl behaves in a weird manner or poses questions totally out of the blue, you know what to do!
This post comes from a man who believes he's in a great relationship -- except, of course, for the fact that his girlfriend constantly feels the need to stir things up and start unnecessary arguments.
Men and women are different. A man, by nature, tends to look for comfort and consistency in his relationship.
A woman, on the other hand, tends to turn her primary relationship into a "Perpetual-Improvement Project." So, if there's nothing to work on or process, she's compelled to create something in order to continue work on her Project. As my Big Sister Seun would say, "They've always gotta mess with things when things don't need fixin'."
You've probably heard the old familiar saying: A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.
The interesting thing about familiar sayings is that a lot of them are based on real wisdom. In relationships, a man avoids change while a woman thrives on it -- if things seem a bit placid and static, it's time for her to stir things up!
In my own words… they have to do it
In essence, yes Segun, I think that women do have an innate need to test and push their men. Why, exactly, must they do it? Ask 50 psychologists and you'll get 50 different answers. But I say that one of the main reasons they push is to see if there's anything there to push up against.
They need to know that you have a backbone, that you'll set limits, that you'll stand up for yourself. It makes them feel safe when you won't take any crap. It somehow provides them with reassurance that you are strong enough and confident enough to fight back when you're provoked and that you're capable of protecting them from danger.
Trying to check a man's protective capabilities by starting arguments is not totally logical, but it is bio -logical. It's a drive that goes back to the days when the womenfolk huddled in the cave while the men fought off a pack of ravenous saber-toothed tigers.
A woman's actual physical survival was dependent on having a strong, brave male at her side who could hunt and kill dangerous animals, and protect her from hostile tribes. That survival-based drive for a provider/protector still motivates the modern female.
it'll always be this way
So, even if a woman has super high Interest Level in you and she is also a sweet, loving and giving person, it's not uncommon for her to continually 'test your mettle' somehow. She'll always feel the need to dig and question, pry and push in subtle or overt ways. Why? Because she's a female.
Remember guys; the man who passes the test is the man who won't be tested.
How Women Test Men
For guys, knowing how women test men will be sort of an ‘expelliarmus’, to disarm women and their tactics! If you do not want to lose out on these brothers, then you might want to stay with me on the love line on what is coming next!
Guys, let me tell you something before I get to the heart of the show tonight. If you thought that you are oozing with social and emotional intelligence just because you dated exactly those girls you wanted, sorry, you have a misconception. Even if those girls seemed to be dumb according to you, ladies will be ladies! However intelligent you are brothers, women will always have an upper hand when it comes to social intelligence and delicate matters of the heart. This social intelligence and overall ‘thinking with the heart’ quality is totally used by women while dating! Men don’t even remotely realize that sometimes when the woman they love is doing something which is not ‘her’, she is just testing him! So men, you have to catch a glimpse of how women test men! That’s what the love line is all about tonight. The big question Why do Women Constantly Tests The Men They Love? and ladies, how do you test your mans love for you?
Why Women Test Men?
Guys, brace yourselves as these are things which beyond such talks or articles, no lady is going to mention about. Yes, the reasons as to why do women test men are going to be discussed tonight on the love line. The first and foremost reason for women throwing those obscure and unexpected googlies to guys is that they want to see what you really are. Further women also want to get an idea about how emotionally strong the guy is or are you a pushover. What women look for in men? A woman needs reassurance all the time that the man she loves is there for her and is strong enough. Another thing a woman wants to know is if her ‘man’ is ‘man’ enough to commit. Eventually these testing times are created by a woman to see if the guy can be trusted.
I bet you never knew right? Now I have given you a peek into how a woman’s mind works? Now it’s time to know and picture how women test men and throw these surprises and how you can deal with them. Mind you, this is a part of a guide to understanding women in relationships!
How Women Test Men and Passing the Test
Okay, it is the time to fight brothers, if you truly love her, then you have to pass the test! You just have no option. Women test guys on several aspects in a relationship. Yes, that is how complicated they are! Women, to say the least basically involves testing for loyalty, attention and trust. Here we go then! The time is ticking!
Let me let you into some things I discovered on my own.
Test #1
The first comes the loyalty test regarding how women test men. Many a times women feel insecure in the relationship. In case your woman calls you up constantly and irks you with ‘where are you’ ‘what are you up to’, just do not get worked up. Never ever lie to such questions. Give precise answers, but never lie. If you lose your head and start a fight, well, then you have had it. Even if you would not be doing anything unacceptable, your woman is going to be suspicious. Take this as a serious relationship advice guys!
Test #2
A woman in a relationship needs to know that whatever she says is being given an ear. In short, she needs full attention of her partner and she can test it for sure! If you are reading or doing anything else and your woman starts talking to you, make sure that you pay complete attention to what she is saying. Better still, keep aside whatever you are doing, give your inputs to the conversation and then go back to what you were doing. If you do not listen to a woman when she is talking, you would be committing the worst crime ever against her! This is the classic case of how women test men and how to pass them. Speaking and sharing is important as that can sort out the relationship issues, if any, hence, pay attention guys!
Test #3
Another test in how women test men is to follow the gaze of the guy. If you are out somewhere - eating or drinking and if a beautiful, sexy woman goes by, your girl will immediately look at you to see how you look at the woman who passed by. To pass this test, casually glancing at her and then looking back at your girl is the best bet. That will mean you are getting to the tricks of understanding women! Gaze at the girl till she disappears and you are calling for trouble!
This is just a trailer of how a woman have these discreet and instant methods of being sure if he is the guy. There are many more such things guys, which fall in this category! But I am sure now you know how women test men!
Generalizing what a woman wants from a man is not easy. Most women think differently and it takes a lot of intuition on your part to really understand what a woman’s thinking. Some women will say they want men who can protect them (like Prince Charming, or some knight from a fairytale). Some will say they want men who will treat them as an equal.
Asking a girl directly will only confuse you, so don’t. However, there is a way to find out what a woman wants from you by taking a closer look at how she tests you.
What are these relationship tests?
Relationship tests come in various forms. They can be the loaded questions that a woman asks on your first date, or they can be the small “pretty-please” favors that a girl asks of you.
Whatever they are, they tell of what the girl you’re with really wants in a boyfriend.
For example…
1. She wants to know if you are a pushover.
Most women are looking for boyfriends, but they can’t pass up the men who are so willing to be their slaves. Can you imagine having a personal “bottomless” purse following you around in a shopping mall or buying you drinks in a bar? That’s the kind of slavery I’m talking about.
The women see these men as “guy friends” who can be used. Not that women WANT to use them, but these guys make girls feel that it’s their pleasure to be of service… so hey, who can resist?
Women will think of being with these men to a certain extent. As far as being practical goes, oh yeah definitely, these pushovers are a catch. But girls get bored of these men pretty quickly, particularly when these guys start demanding something back.
Remember, you want a woman to pursue you, fall in love with you and treat you like her king… you don’t want her to pity you or take you for granted because you let her walk all over you.
2. She wants to know if you can commit.
Monogamy becomes an issue when a girl suspects you’re a player. This line of thinking shows in the way she asks are-you-a-player questions.
For instance, a woman asks, “How come you don’t have a girlfriend? Can’t you commit?”
You can say “I’ll commit when I find the right girl.”
Saying it this way is like killing two birds with one stone. First, you’re telling her you’re capable of commitment. Second, you’re making her wonder if she’s the “right girl” you’re talking about.
3. She wants to know if you can be trusted.
More specifically, she wants to know if you’re going to hit on her best friend when she’s not looking.
To test you, a girl will concoct some weird “what if” scenarios like … a threesome between you, her and another girl. Whatever you do, just say no.
Even if you secretly want to do her friend, just say you “will never do it”.
Trust is an issue in most relationships, and a girl will only really let herself fall for you if you show that you can be trusted.
So, the next time, your girl behaves in a weird manner or poses questions totally out of the blue, you know what to do!
Perpetual Improvement Project got me laughing! Your perspective is enlightening coming from a man!! There are much more PIPs going on than thisPerpetual Improvement Project got me laughing! Your perspective is enlightening coming from a man!! There are much more PIPs going on than this
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